Adrupt

I realized. I'm too easily influenced.

by the demons in my head

now the negativity of training is back on me. what to do.

so has the fear of gaining weight

that obscene paralyzing fear
and i can't stop eating, just to openly defy it.

but the more it lashes out. damn it.

so now basically when i train, i'm thinking.

run faster to lose all that fats.

honestly. this is so twisted

and i'm not that fascinated by fire anymore. SHOCKER.

so tired

lets just curl up and forget the world.

Twirl for me

If Gale loved katniss the way he says he did, he would have comforted her, not criticized her. kissed her, not yell at her. gale didn’t love katniss. he always had an opinion about what she said, what she did, how she handled things. Gale didn’t understand katniss the way she needed to be. gale didn’t lose everything he loved, he didn’t have to relive the nightmares of the arena every night. only Peeta could understand and love Katniss, broken spirit and all.

He thought he loved her but I didn’t. The reason Peeta bothered him is because Galee thought he was the only one who had a bond with her, and he couldn’t bear the fact that someone else might. Gale didn’t love her. He was just really possessive over his only friend. I don’t think that it makes him selfish though.

Have you ever have someone chasing after you for a long time, and you don’t like them but you love the feeling of having someone there thinking of you? And then they move on and, selfishly, you feel betrayed? That’s kind of what happened to Gale. He was so sure he had her, he didn’t go for it. Then she find someone else, someone who wanted to give her something, instead of taking something from her and he felt the need to take back what he thought was his. Except she wasn’t. Gale is a cold character, as is Katniss. But I dare you to lose your parents and keep being warm and lovely as it is. It be a lie if they were that way. Gale wasn’t right for Katniss, and she wasn’t right for him. They were both broken, and even tough they would’ve supported each other, they would’ve stayed stocked on their own bitterness. I don’t hate Gale because I like Peeta, I hate him because I know what he feels, because I have felt it and it’s a selfish wrong and sad feeling. And he did love her, furiously actually, but not for the good reason and not at the right time.


found it on tumblr. it should be a lit book

The Hunger Games Blogs
http://-catchingfire.tumblr.com
http://readymind.tumblr.com
http://quarterquelled.tumblr.com
http://thehungergames.tumblr.com
http://i-volunteer--as-tribute.tumblr.com/
http://mockingfire.tumblr.com

btw, Broken Arrow by Pixie Lott applies here more than in Beastly BUT I ALSO LOVE THAT SHOW

Kill us softly

I HATE TAKING PROZAC GOSH IT KEEPS GETTING STUCK IN MY THROAT

but happy thing is I don't have to see my psychiatrist for another 6 months!!!!!

happy


watched today. it was nice. reminded me of the times in hospital (:

hate being a bitch

Remember.

Sophie Kinsella IS AN AMZING WRITER

SO IS SUZANNE COLLINS.

anyway, today's training was killer. but i'd prolly gain back all the cals from baking

made brownies and tira cause peeps requested

anyway. the world should really just explode

dont wanna face comp or CA1

Titanium

Qing's bday today!!!

HAD FUN

but then, she cried and we were all damn shocked.

anyway, watched a bit of tv, ate cake, all her new year food

then went Swensen's with both Nats and her family

and ate until i feel like bursting D:

BUT TODAY WAS HAPPY. well most (:

didn't take any pics but thats cause we lazy haha

Moon on their wings.

FREAKING AMAZING.

stuffed myself like a pig over new year

going to weigh myself tmr. oh and

gonna train crazy now. 6 rounds morning jog, 5 rounds cohort morning jog and whatever.

fat

oh and i love hunger games
slept at 1.30 last night reading book 1

finishing book 3 now.








no mood to talk. again CAUSE I FEEL DAMN GROSS.

bye

Your time

4.3k is. yeah

took 6 polaroids <3

the end.

House of bricks

So many stuff going on. stressed for sat but excited also
scared for Os and really bored with studying.

it's going to be a fast year. look jan is almost over. and it doesn't even feel like it.


I'm outta sight, I'm outta mind
- Ed Sheeran <3

Daydreams

New bedroom! with pretty lights along the window, almost like tumblr <3

anyway ran 13k today

COOL RIGHT.

actually i ran 2.5k in the morning, another 2.5k with the cohort
then 8k at MacRitchie

taking about a half min break to drink water after 4k

THE ROAD IS FREAKING HORRIBLE CAN.

but i'm happy cause I didn't think of stopping haha
until the end of the first 4k haiyo

but then it was not bad :D

I think i could've ran faster? but 8k can. tell me how to go fast.

but Ms Lim said this was mentality training

Like, one of the perks of learning how to battle your mental demons is also learning how to believe in yourself. kinda

Whenever I feel like giving up, I've learnt to talk myself out of it.

You know the usual: childhood songs, prayers, NEW YEAR :D the future.

then everything becomes so insignificant. like it won't last forever so why give up?

this works 100% for running. but for the fat thinking, only occasionally

counting during running works to. every 4 steps 1 breath. and then finding a beat to the steps and matching random songs to it. IT WORKS. don't think about running that much and no stress

ANYWAY
comp on sat! i dont know how long but im exciteddddd

i promise to go all out.maybe

I might be dropping bio

Perfect you

I just drew up this whole book list. cause I was procrastinating haha

haiz.

FOUND THIS ON t




asdfghjkl.

I'd be hypocritical if I said... something

oh and people I'm sorry for pestering you to come. FREE WILL i wont ask that much anymoree

WANNA SEE MY BOOK LIST. OK

NAH IM LAZY bye