pirouette

I think now, i have disordered eating more than an eating disorder
i mean

1. i don't feel guilty when i stick to my safe foods
2. im eating 900-1000 calories a day hello
3. i don't kill myself if i gained 0.1kg out of nowhere

look at this.

Anorexia nervosa is characterized by:

• Emaciation (nope)
• A relentless pursuit of thinness and unwillingness to maintain a normal or healthy weight
• Intense fear of gaining weight (well. not intense)
• Distorted body image, a self-esteem that is heavily influenced by perceptions of body weight and shape, or a denial of the seriousness of low body weight
• Lack of menstruation among girls and women
• Extremely restricted eating.  (not extremely. just a tad)

Disordered eating is characterized by a wide range of unhealthy eating behaviors and weight loss methods such as chronic restrained eating, compulsive eating, and habitual dieting. It may also include irregular eating patterns, avoidance of certain foods or food groups, and the denial of physical hunger and satiety, usually for the sake of losing weight. Disordered eating may begin as an effort to drop a few pounds or get in better shape, but the behaviors can become obsessive. Some disordered eating patterns can include symptoms of both anorexia and bulimia nervosa.

Disordered eating is you dont eat what you need, and have and unbalanced diet.
Anorexia means you pretty much don't eat at all.

you see?

but on the other hand

ana behaviors

1. compulsive weighing
2. fear of gaining weight (BUT NOT EXTREME FEAR)
3. not eating high caloric foods i make for others

does eating the same food fall under disordered eating or ed?

i'm doubting because

1. i dont have the compulsion to exercise

2. i don't eat that little/ not at all A FREAKING 1000CALS MY DEARS.
3. and im not hungry. 

dr lee would probably say im in denial

but i dont think i am

i lost 6kg over 3 months?

thats not a lot

in fact, its so freaking gradual

honestly, im not in a rush to lose weight

i dont mind doing it slowly

because i dont want a repeat of last time. 6kg in 2 weeks dont know how the hell that happened

so no. i dont think im anorexic. more of crazy disordered eating. and thinking

do you think im in denial too?

but i really dont exercise AT ALL. like a fucking lazy pig.